For me, one of the hardest things to understand afterward was that I wasn’t only grieving our child. I was grieving an entire lifetime I had already started imagining.

““21 Weeks” is the hardest song I’ve ever released.

My wife and I went into an ultrasound expecting to find out whether our baby was a boy or a girl. Instead, we learned that we had lost our baby.

Teaching them things. Picking them up when they fell. Getting a call someday because their car broke down. Watching them grow up.

Memories that never happened, but somehow still felt real enough to lose.

“21 Weeks” came from trying to put words around that.

How do you say goodbye to somebody you never got the chance to say hello to?

Today is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.

If you’ve experienced this kind of loss, I hope this song makes you feel understood for a few minutes. And if you love somebody who has, maybe it can help you understand a little more of what they carry.

This song started as ours.

Today, I hope it can belong to anyone who needs it.”

Heartfelt words shared by Ben, father to their beloved baby. Originally shared on Instagram, with permission to republish on stillbirthfoundation.org.au.

Listen to “21 Weeks” on Spotify and other platforms.